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Spider's Little Daddy/transcript
places a dirty burger on his tongue *'Mandy': Uh... looks at the burger and sees a family of flies on a picnic blanket, sitting on the burger *'Daddy Fly': Do you mind?! whacks Billy on the nose *''screams as Mandy covers her ears. Billy drags his tongue along the ground, and spits out the burger. It flies towards his house, where Grim holding a bucket and sponge is standing in his room, wearing a pink apron and a red cloth on his head.'' *'Grim': Finally! After seven hours of cleaning up after them brats, everything is spotless! for two seconds. Suddenly, the burger crashes through the window, creating a chain reaction of everything and the shelves falling down and breaking. One of the drawers catches on fire, turning the sprinklers on. *'Grim': on his knees, sobbing WHHHHHHHHHHHYYYYYYYYYYYYY?!!!!! *''at the park'' *'Billy': Ah! Ah! Ah! I hate bugs! Oh, my gosh! What if I turn into a bug right now?! *'Mandy': Let's do a bug test. Tell me the first thing that crawls into your little brain. Lady? *'Billy': quivers Bug! *'Mandy': June? *'Billy': Bug! *'Mandy': Yo, sucker, don't be...? *'Billy': Buggin'! *'Mandy': Yep. You're turning into a bug. *'Billy': Bu-bu-bu-bu-bu... crazy ...BUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUG!!! *''the bathroom, Jeff the spider, hanging from the ceiling, looks through an air vent and watches the people in the park.'' *'Jeff': Wow. Who knew fathers and sons could be so happy? sighs If only I had a chance to show my dad what a great son I turned out to be. at some photos on the wall But all I have to remember him by are these... to cry baby pictures! pictures show Billy holding Jeff as an egg, Billy sitting on the egg, Billy screaming in horror, Jeff waving, and Jeff watching Billy run out of the door screaming. *''wakes up and sees Jeff'' *'Jeff': Are you okay? looks terrified It's alright, Dad. It's me, your son, Jeff! in on Jeff's ugly face, claws, and dripping fangs Happy to see me? stands up, looking scared. A centipede crawls down from the wall onto Billy's hat. Billy jumps in fear. Hey, Dad, are you gonna eat that? takes the centipede and gobbles it up. Billy runs out of the bathroom, screaming. Mandy watches. No, Dad, wait! You can have the bug! Oh, what did I do wrong? *'Mandy': You're being too nice. *'Jeff': Mandy, I don't think you CAN be TOO nice. I mean, maybe too FORGIVING, but too NICE breaks the canopy above the door, making it fall on Jeff. Oops. You dropped your canopy. *'Mandy': See? TOO NICE. Look, nice gets their attention. But mean puts the hook in 'em. Just looks at Irwin. walks up to Irwin, who's holding a double scoop ice cream *'Irwin': Hi, Mindy. Want a lick of my... knocks the ice cream in his face *'Mindy': Oops. Later, loser. away *'Irwin': I love you. stares for a second *'Jeff': Wow! That's all it takes? Mandy, I want you to teach me to stop being so nice, and start being mean, cruel, and evil. More like you! *'Mandy': I'l do it for a hundred bucks. *'Jeff': A hundred bucks?! Well, for you... two hundred! her the money *'Mandy': Meet me at Billy's house at 6pm. And bring a bad attitude. *''opens Billy's door, revealing Jeff hiding in the bushes'' *'Mandy': Hey, Jeff. *'Jeff': whispering Psst! Amanda! I'm over here! *'Mandy': sarcastically Oh, you're definately Billy's son. *'Jeff': OK, Mandy. Time to play hardball with Dad. And to show him I mean business, I made him some pony tear truffles. out a tray of them. Mandy facepalms. Billy comes outside, not noticing Jeff *'Billy': Hey, Mandy! Guess who got the crazy high score? *'Jeff': You? *'Billy': Yep, me. Jeff AAAAAAAAAH! Mandy in fear It's that freaky giant spider, and he's made pony tear truffles! one No white chocolate. RUN! *'Mandy': Attack. *'Jeff': the tray away Grr! Dad? Dad! through the door. Mandy watches *'Mandy': This is gonna be good. corners a terrified Billy *'Jeff': Dad, I know that maybe I didn't turn out the way you planned, but gosh darn it, I'm your son! And I cordially request some love! whispers How am I doing? *'Mandy': Meaner! *'Jeff': Right! Strike the courtual part! screams and grabs a table Dad? slams the table down on Jeff's head *'Billy': a boombox Get away from me, freak! Yaaah! the boombox on Jeff, then starts throwing more furniture at him *'Jeff': It's working, Mandy! hit in the head with a lava lamp He's showering me with gifts! runs away Oh, Mandy! I can feel the warmth of Daddy's love, surging through my shattered lenses! *'Mandy': This is gonna be harder than I thought. Time for Plan B. *'Jeff': No more Mr. Nice Spider.